Tag Archives: summer camp

many parents wouldn’t exist if their children had been a little more careful

Top Ten Reasons I Send my Kids to Sleep-away Camp

1. It would be bad to see a story about myself on the cover of a “newspaper” on the supermarket line, in a headline such as, “Suburban Mother of 3 Finally Snaps!”

2. Teens and pre-teens, like their 2 and 3 year old selves, do not understand that when they speak to me when I’m talking on the phone with someone else, I really do not want to be interrupted. Really. Unless they’re bleeding. Which they usually aren’t. And even then. They know where the band-aids are.

3. I get to write. I get to write. I get to write. Believe it or not, I do not want to drive them places all summer. I do not want to make them lunch. I do not care if they’re bored. When they’re not here I actually get to write.

4. They need a break from me. I’m a pain in the ass.

5. I need a break from them. They’re pains in the ass.

6. Oh yeah! They happen to love camp! They gain independence, have an inordinate amount of fun, learn skills such as rock climbing, wake-boarding, sailing, ceramics, and living in community.

7. I like spending thousands of dollars every summer. On the shit they need to take with them to camp. And on camp. It’s fun.

8. Did I mention that I write when they’re at camp? I get to write!

9. I like to play classical music, 70’s disco and the Grateful Dead, loud, on my car radio. I do not like it when my passenger immediately asks, “Can I change this?” when they get in the car. (See #1, above.)

10. Why are lists always “top ten”? Because of our fingers & toes?

What about you? What do you need a break from? Do you give it to yourself?


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